Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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