why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
ugly people sure do ruin things
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
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