sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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