About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize