She is in my trunk
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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