Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water