Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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