I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.