On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
i now understand why vodka
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Randomize