We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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