Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
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Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
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Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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