Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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