Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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