yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
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I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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