I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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