flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize