You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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