porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
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EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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