you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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