And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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