I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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