i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
