Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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