you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!