We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Randomize
