just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize