so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Dating After Heartbreak
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.