Texts From Last Night

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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile

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  (201): even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile http://tfl.nu/o0hq
  Replies (26) Good night (3895) Bad night (912) Order T-Shirt
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen

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  (864): I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen http://tfl.nu/n18y
  Replies (34) Good night (6732) Bad night (1331) Order T-Shirt
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.

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  (856): Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose. http://tfl.nu/pmmh
  Replies (11) Good night (3660) Bad night (1252) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.

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  (203): I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious. http://tfl.nu/9dex
  Replies (24) Good night (4270) Bad night (774) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers

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  (416): He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers http://tfl.nu/ldwb
  Replies (15) Good night (4739) Bad night (1267) Order T-Shirt
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  (714): View more from California

  I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister

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  (714): I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister http://tfl.nu/d8wy
  Replies (13) Good night (3752) Bad night (797) Order T-Shirt
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing

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  (785): he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing http://tfl.nu/bfcf
  Replies (2) Good night (3397) Bad night (777) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.

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  (512): The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain. http://tfl.nu/r278
  Replies (6) Good night (1880) Bad night (724) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.

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  (860): Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am. http://tfl.nu/9zeo
  Replies (6) Good night (1632) Bad night (619) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.

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  (801): Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month. http://tfl.nu/irqs
  Replies (12) Good night (1886) Bad night (1050) Order T-Shirt
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I just commented on the education level of his penis.

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  (734): I just commented on the education level of his penis. http://tfl.nu/tupj
  Replies (2) Good night (704) Bad night (595) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk

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  (908): if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk http://tfl.nu/13sw
  Replies (2) Good night (730) Bad night (231) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship

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  (608): Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship http://tfl.nu/u2r6
  Replies (4) Good night (830) Bad night (213) Order T-Shirt
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  (747): View more from California

  That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!

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  (747): That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away! http://tfl.nu/9pk5
  Replies (2) Good night (273) Bad night (548) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.

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  (618): I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion. http://tfl.nu/gnl9
  Replies (5) Good night (395) Bad night (508)

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