Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
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