i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize