yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
