Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
