So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Randomize