FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
it glows. i had to have it.
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She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
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Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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