Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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