I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize