I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I just gargled with NyQuil
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize