You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize