she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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