summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.