I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
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