For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.