Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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