I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
my vag is so smooth its legendary
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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