It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I can't trust your balls anymore.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?