Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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