One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
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