I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
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got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
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note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?