wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize