All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize