I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
